Have you ever wondered what God thinks about or what is on His mind? I know he is mindful of us all and have felt his presence at moments in my life when I’ve felt lonely. In Psalms is talks about His mindfulness of us all. Boy what a job!! That means He is constantly thinking about you and me. What an amazing thought—the Creator of the universe always has something on His mind, and that something is you and I ! He wants our lives to be happy, joyful and worthy to live with Him again. I worry about my children, grandchildren, sisters and extended family constantly. I believe we are all children of God, can you imagine being the father of all the children on earth?
This has been a whirlwind of emotions for me these past couple of weeks. I try to read from a good book everyday, I keep my mind on positive uplifting stories of people, real people who have endured their trials with grace. I want to be one of those people, the best way to accomplish this is to surround myself with the types of people and learn from them. I have been given an incredible opportunity to make changes in my life by doing this.
So many people today think God is looking down on them, just waiting for them to mess up. They say things like, “If I walk into a church, the roof will cave in!” But nothing could be further from the truth! When God thinks about you, He’s not thinking about your mistakes, failures or shortcomings. No, His thoughts are always for your good. He’s not thinking about what you did wrong; He’s thinking about what you did right. He’s not thinking about how far you have to go; He’s thinking about how far you’ve come. Living life of discouragement and ridicule takes time to make those thoughts of inadequacy go away. It takes a constant day to day intentional person to make it happen. Funny thing is we are all given the same opportunity for change, I believe there are no excuses for not changing, I may take a short time or if your like me, a slow learner it could take years. I can tell you from my experience even if it takes 5-10-15 years it is worth every second of happiness the change will bring to your life.
For me it was listening over and over again to inspirational people who have been down the same or close to the same road. I started then taking notes, and becoming intentional in my goal setting. Getting over those obstacles is not as hard as we sometimes make it be. I had to put my own trust issues to the test–this has taken years–but it worked. Believing in myself, taking away the negative thoughts not only of myself but of others–took years–but it too is working. For example I have made it a commitment to myself to die with no regrets. This seemed to be a daily struggle for so long, my past would come up in my mind I would feel badly for how I treated a person, especially someone in my family. Saying sorry is powerful, once I was able to admit my error and ask for forgiveness it was life changing. The person then has the power in their hands to decide to forgive or not, but the load has been lifted from my shoulders. I’m not necessarily talking about huge mistakes most are my big mouth getting in the way, speaking when I should of processed first. Learning my opinion does not always matter, listening is a much better attribute to accomplish.
I know today that God approves of me. He’s pleased with me. He may not be pleased with all of my choices or actions all of the time, but when God looks at me, He sees me as His precious and valuable creation. We are all His masterpieces. He’s counted every hair on my head, and bottles every tear I cry. I know I am significant, my life is significant, and the things that concern me concern Him. He carefully watches over every detail of my life, and there is nothing too big or too small for His attention. I feel confident in saying I am the apple of His eye, the center of His world, and He wants me to know Him and His heart of compassion and forgiveness, I look forward to the day when He will take me in His arms and say “Well done, though good and faithful daughter, you have served me well.”
All throughout history, people have said things about God, but I believe that what He says about Himself is what’s most important. In Exodus, He says that He is a gracious God. That tells me that He wants me to know that He is not only gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, and rich in love. If I can open my heart and receive His love in a fresh, new way. I will ask God to help me understand His unconditional love. Knowing this concept helps build confidence in me. I know that God is always there for me and I’m always on His mind!
On my 1st surgery February 6th I had a 10 inch nerve removed from my calf. He then took that nerve threaded it through the back of the good ear on the left, through the left cheek, between the nose and lip then through the cheek on the right to connect it and pray for results to happen within a few months. During the surgery it was discovered my earlobe was sew inside my right ear. Without hesitation my surgeon took care of that by removing it and replacing it where it should be. There is a risk the earlobe will not take. I wouldn’t call them complications but we did have some set backs. This surgery was expected to be 2 hour surgery but ended up being 8 and half hours. Ok for me I was restfully dreaming in my happy places, but I always feel bad for Eric having to wait, Because of the unexpected length and details of the surgery I was not able to go home-I stayed in the Mayo Hospital for 3 days.
I was also not expecting to stay the night in the Mayo Hospital but was allowed to come home on the 3rd day. Initially hearing out patient was exciting, words we’d never heard before. The thought of going home after a surgery elated me. Still waking up in recovery, asking “What time is it?” Then hearing “5 o’clock honey” I knew it was going to be at least an over night stay for me.
When I did arrive home, I started to form very large marble sized balls on my left cheek. The distortion and swelling were so bad it made my lip split down the middle. Within a couple of days I was back in the O.R. having my face reexamined. Those marble size balls were blood clots, he removed those and cut off the right earlobe where it had not taken to the surgery and the skin was completely black. YAY, the surgery was only a couple of hours and I was able to come home the same day.
With all of that being said, life has been put on hold– difficult–YES annoying–YES Surgery 24 and 25 happened this week. I was concerned when a pink liquid was dripping from my ear down my neck, this went on constantly for a few days before I called the surgeons office. It was impossible for me to see where the liquid was coming from since my head was wrapped like a mummy. Thursday I met with him 1st thing in the morning, he took off all the wrap and there was not one drip of liquid–Of course the second I got out to my car after seeing him it started to drain again. Since I knew he was going into a surgery I decided to go home and make it back to see him on Monday-tommorrow.