Tag: Never Give Up

Memory Of Cleveland Clinic

Memory Of Cleveland Clinic

Every 3rd of July I am reminded of fighting for my life in The Cleveland Clinic. Four years ago today I was in surgery, literally hoping for a miracle. Little did I know the miracle was sitting right here in Arizona, with Doctor Lettieri.

On July 3rd 2014 I was rolled into surgery, Eric gave me a kiss on the forehead as they wheeled me into the operating room. Tears rolled down my cheeks onto the pillow, nurses kindly asked what they could do to help; shaking my head, watching them walk away I knew there was nothing anyone could do. Not even with the best surgeons on the face of the earth, no one could be able to bring my smile back.

The worst was still ahead of me, waking up in the recovery room after an eleven hour surgery I felt my head. It was full of staples, like a train track from one side to the other and down the back of my skull. My ear was pounding and swollen. I just wanted to see Eric and go home; after seven weeks in Cleveland I was depressed, sad and disoriented.

The next day, the fourth of July 2014 is a day I will never forget. No attending’s were in the ICU, the residents were in charge for the Holiday. Pain beyond my belief was surging through my body; a senior resident forgot to put orders in for pain medicine; I thought I would die on that day. I was prepared with letters to my children and dear husband. When the resident did not answer page after page to come to the ICU-I went further and further into a deep dark place, actually wanting my life to end because the pain was so bad. Nurses rubbed my legs and listened to me sing “Be Still My Soul” and “I am a Child of God” over and over again. It was an hour and fifteen minutes the senior resident finally make it to my room, followed behind him were other junior residents. He questioned my pain like I was faking; wondered why I was crying, and asked me too many questions; which I believe now was a senior resident showing off for the junior residents. I was gasping for air I couldn’t speak without trembling, he finally gave me the pain medicine. Even after the pain medicine was in my system my body shook like a baby, composing myself was difficult.

This is one of the junior residents Brendan Alleyne-he came to visit me after that incident and held my hand. The compassion he showed was nothing I will ever forget, I wish I could tell him what his acts of kindness did for my faith in the future of medicine. I’m thinking about him today, Dr. Lettieri is constantly telling me about the ego’s of residents, just like the senior resident I encountered at Cleveland Clinic. They forget who they are serving, I often wonder if he would have treated me different if I had been his mother, wife or child. Thank you Dr. Alleyne wherever you are today, I believe you are caring and sharing for your own patients now and hopefully learned something from this experience that will help you always remember patients are real people, with real families and a story to tell.

XOXO Monya

My Way

My Way

So there is something to be said about Frank Sinatra’s famous song “My Way” I’ve lived a life that most people might raise an eyebrow to. I have definitely bit off more than I could chew at times.  I’ve had my share of tears and heartache but more than that I handled it my way.  One thing I can say that is much different from Frank’s is I live with no regrets.

I have stood tall at times and felt insignificant at other times. I’m glad life hasn’t been an easy road, because through the twists and turns of life I’ve had opportunity to learn I love my life. I celebrate little things, I see somethings that may seem insignificant to other people and find the beauty in them.

I am true to myself and no longer need acceptance from other people. I am always imagining new ways of making life better through my interactions with other people. It only seems natural if I have lived and learned from my mistakes, aches and pains I would want to teach other people what ‘not’ to do…right? Or be teachable enough to learn from theirs. Boy I wish it was that easy, unfortunately we all have a path or journey in life we should be learning from, we own those experiences. I’ve  been taught so much about behaviors of the ‘human’ race; we all process trial, error and successes differently.

Through life’s inevitable up’s and downs I’ve had the opportunity to meet some amazing people and build a legacy business through network marketing.  In the beginning the purpose for joining was to expand my circle of friends. When we became empty nester’s I needed the interaction with other people. I soon found out not all companies are created equal. After four years with a company I thought I knew, loved and trusted the direction of they chose to take was not in alignment with my personal beliefs….remember I live with no regrets? I could not continue to recruit friends, family or strangers into an institution I no longer believed was going in the direction I wanted for my journey in life.

I have now aligned myself with some wonderful people who have taught me more in a couple of months about business, staying congruent and the best part…..I have seen my blood work change for the good. Bottom line…….I did this all My way, even when it wasn’t a popular thing to do, or friends and family rolled their eyes at me. Staying consistent with who you are, being true to yourself and listening to the inner voice that tells you ‘yes’ or ‘no’ is essential for living a happy and productive life. Do it your way.

Monya Bonbon

 

 

His Grace

His Grace

 

So Much To See

I remember taking this picture in 2015, just a year after being diagnosed with facial paralysis. Frenchie took me on a trip between surgeries; funny I can’t remember where we were. We’ve been on so many trips together trying hard to mark everything off of my bucket list. I do recall looking out of the window far above the clouds and seeing this breath-taking view; it was at this moment I realized I have taken so much for granted; our world is beautiful so many nooks and crannies we will never explore, but just knowing they are out there gives me hope and a sense of a spirit much larger than my soul can imagine.

There is so much to see in this beautiful world of ours; but my favorite place to be is with my family, there is no other joy and peace I feel watching my children grow into happy, healthy adults who cherish one another and understand the importance of time, time together making memories to last for eternity.

I started back to work yesterday, it was physically painful however I’ll take the pain over depression any day any time. There is something about being through so many surgeries, procedures, pokes and tests that make me wonder once again what I am supposed to be learning.  I am well aware of all my weaknesses-I say damn and hell every once in a while, I judge people when I should be reaching out to them, I’m simply not perfect and not ready to die. I try daily to be better than I was the day before and so often fail in my attempt; but one thing I never do is leave my Heavenly Father out of my daily routine. He guides me and helps me to become the woman I strive to be.

This was me on May 1st, 2014 I thought I was so happy, look at my smile, my beautiful teeth. Oh how I loved to smile.  I’d finished chemo, radiation and several surgeries and was well on my way to being ‘ok’ with living with cancer. I see some wrinkles, but mostly I see joy in my eyes for the happiness I felt being alive. Then life came to a screeching halt and I was once again faced with an unfortunate life altering transfiguration.

On May 15, 2014 this was me lying in the Mayo Clinic hospital fighting for my life.  There was a sadness I had never experienced. My life would never be the same, my face would show the sadness and sorrow. There was simply no one on earth who could possibly understand what it felt like to hear my surgeon tell me “I’m sorry to tell you, your face will never be the same again, you need to get used to the new you”

That task seemed daunting and unachievable I didn’t know how I could face a world where physical beauty had become the main focus for so many people. I never realized I was one of those people, I was vain I wanted my smile back I wanted to be normal, heck I’d even take typical. With help from Dr.Lettieri teaching me grace comes from within, I have been able to somewhat come to accept who I am, what I am meant to do here on earth; and it is definitely not to be a fashion model. My Heavenly Father has so much more in store for me and I’ve come to understand true authenticity and absolute beauty comes from knowing who you are and where you are going, it comes from first loving yourself no matter the circumstances life throws at us.  It certainly sounds easier than it actually is to do, I have spent 3 years working on myself, studying and trying to teach our  youth to love their life. If all of us could see ourselves through our Father in Heaven’s eyes I think we would be surprised to know what He sees in each of us; I believe He knows my heart, He feels my pain but mostly He understands I am trying everyday to become a worthy woman of infinite worth in His eyes.

This was me just a few days ago at Shane Wright’s luncheon after his funeral; I love this picture with Archer, still bruised and swollen looking at this picture I realize my grandchildren will never know the face or person I used to be they only know Bonbon exactly how I am today, and they love me unconditionally as I do them. The woman in this picture has come a long way with still so much to learn about herself and other’s. There is no better Hope than knowing I have many years to learn and teach other’s how to cope with unforeseen circumstances and to accept to love themselves in away no one on earth can understand. I am truly blessed and Amazed at the grace He so fully offers all of us.

Monya Bonbon

See You Later

See You Later

To say it’s been a whirlwind of emotions the past 6 weeks would be an understatement. This is Shane Wright, his son Brian is married to my daughter Kaitlyn. Shane celebrated his birthday on May 24th with his wife children and nine grandchildren; two of which we share grand parenting with. Kaitlyn said his birthday was so fun, they played and danced together ate pizza had ice cream and cake. Shane sat watching his children and grandchildren laugh and play together from his own words “We’re told by Heavenly Father we may have joy in our posterity. Nothing compares to the joy that I feel when our family is all together. It’s the purest joy a parent can have. My heart is full” On Wednesday May 30th this giant of a man left this life to live with his Heavenly Father.

Shane’s posterity, such a beautiful family.

The first time I met Brian I knew he was a special man; most parents think their daughters are too good for most men but Eric and I are were so impressed with Brian we were afraid Kaitlyn would scare him off. When Brian asked Eric for Kaitlyn’s hand in marriage, he actually told him no twice. Poor Brian was living in Utah and chose to drive to Arizona twice to get Eric’s approval. I explained to Eric it is always hard on father’s to finally hand their daughter’s over to another man for them to care and love for, but it was time. We had the opportunity to meet Shane and Dee Dee Wright before they were married and immediately our hearts were bonded to them. Kaitlyn and Brian were married and had their wedding reception in our backyard in November of 2009.  I was diagnosed with cancer during their engagement and started chemo therapy just two days after their wedding; I will never forget Shane and Dee Dee’s constant prayer’s on my behalf.

Shane (grandad) Phoenix and Dee Dee (Mimi)

Over the years and two grandchildren later we grew to love this man and were so proud to have the opportunity to co-grandparent with he and Dee Dee.  Shane was a stone mason, he had an eye for perfection when it came to his profession. He also raised his children to have respect for other’s and to share the knowledge they had of the Gospel of Christ. The last time I spoke to Shane he was visiting in Arizona and had helped pick out stone for a fireplace in Haleigh and Scott’s home. We stood outside next to his truck while Phoenix played and ate snacks from his granddad’s truck.

He asked me how I was doing and told me he never misses a day of praying for me. Then he looked at me and said “Perspectives change when you know you are not going to be on earth forever, we have truly been blessed.”  Shane knew he had some time left but was also realistic enough to know what he was diagnosed with was incurable and unless he was struck by lightning or hit by a car, he would definitely die from his diagnosis.

It was evident when I sat in the Chapel at his funeral and watched over 300 people sit and listened to his family speak of Shane and his incredible accomplishments in life; and when I say accomplishments it had nothing to do with money. Shane helped youth, many young boys grow and become fine men, husbands and fathers. They testified of Shane’s undying sacrifice’s as he served others unconditionally.  I don’t believe Shane had an enemy’s, everyone loved him. His smile and attention to details lit up any room he entered. Each and every time Eric and I saw him he looked at us in the eyes and asked about us, how we were doing, how each of our children and grandchildren were–simply put he cared genuinely for people.

When Brian spoke at the funeral, he was speaking about his father but was describing himself in every way. I love Brian, I love everything about him we are blessed to have him in our family and know he will miss his father deeply but will carry on the traditions of his father and pass down his work ethic and compassion for other people to his own children.

I will miss Shane and still have a hard time believing he is gone from our lives for now; so until we meet again I will do my best to be a good person, share memories with Phoenix, Archer and their future children about the amazing grandad they had.  I never say good-bye so see you later Shane

Monya Bonbon

I Can Only Imagine

I Can Only Imagine

My body has physically been through so much trauma, I often wonder how I have survived it all.  Yesterday I had the pleasure of picking up Recker from school. My Heavenly Father knew I needed this sweet boy in my life, he was born just four months after I was diagnosed, I was blessed to be able to watch him when his mom (my daughter) went back to work.  I will never forget the day I stood at the top of my stairs and begged Eric not to go to work, the depression was so bad during chemo I wanted to literally die. Eric looked up at me and said “Your almost done babe, just keep fighting. Recker is coming over today you need to be here for him.”  I sat on the floor and bawled as I listened to him shut the door.  I couldn’t imagine one more day of throwing up, pain and depression.

When Recker arrived I dried my eyes and held him in my arms.  I’d make it through another day staring into his beautiful eyes, the focus on him kept me alive I loved taking care of him he needed me and I needed him.  Within a year he was diagnosed with Autism, although we were incredibly sad, we also had no idea what autism was or how it would effect our family.  Eight years later, I constantly wish I could be in his head and understand what he is feeling or thinking.

When I picked him up from school, he got in the back seat put on his seat belt–I looked back at him to make sure he was safe, smiled put my finger to my chin and said “I love you Recker” he then put his finger to his chin and said what sounded to be “I love you.”  We drove in silence, well except me talking to him about his day and how school was–he stared into the open air with no response.  When we arrived at my home he immediately put his swim suit on and was ready to dive into the not so warm water.  I sat and watched him swim for over two hours with no verbal communication.  He was perfectly content and so happy.

I realized while watching him, it’s us that are sad for him-he will eventually if he hasn’t already understand that he is different, but we try to teach him he is not less than any other child or person-just different. That night I went to see the movie ‘I Can Only Imagine’ a true story I recommend everyone to see.  It was difficult to sit through, this boy was abused physically and verbally by his father and so many parts of it reminded me of my younger years.

Tonight as I ponder the words from that song, I tried to lose myself in the words of the beautiful words. I can only imagine what it will be like to be in Heaven once again with Recker, both of us with perfect bodies and minds, no more trauma or mis-understandings just pure love. I will finally be surrounded by the unconditional love of a God who has reached down and pulled me out of difficult times. I can only imagine when that day comes my heart will be entwined with perfect knowledge of exactly what God see’s in each one of us.. I will probably have a hard time speaking, but we will not be able to get Recker to stop talking, it’s interesting in our lives we take so much for granted. I cannot image living in a world where you want so badly to communicate with people, especially the people you love most-family. Imagine how hard it would be to understand every word other’s are saying but not being able to respond. What a joyous day it will be for me to see Recker embrace our Savior and hear Him tell Recker what a special boy he is.

On a few occasions I have had the opportunity during surgeries to visit Heaven and see a glimps of what I believe is the most beautiful, perfect place I have ever visited.  Because of those visits I have been granted,  I want to live my life in a way my family will be proud of, I want to help and serve other’s I will do anything it takes to live there for Eternity once my body is ready to part from this world. It is glorious and beautiful nothing hear on earth compares to Heaven–I will be with Recker, Ezra and Theo and hopefully my entire family for eternity–I love that thought.

Love Monya Bonbon

 

 

There is an upside to feeling Down

There is an upside to feeling Down

Positive emotions always feel good but experts say the negative ones are just as important.
I think social media has so many good features and the idea of seeing into other’s lives can be used for good. Scroll through your social media outlets chances are you will see smiling faces and stories of perfect children. Couples holding hands walking at sunset on the beach. friends toasting over celebrations and promotions. There are some who post about somber moments or topics, but overall, positivity outshines negativity.

The problem with this, real life isn’t always roses and candy. Live is full of disappointments, both small and large. We are all thrown curveballs, form lay offs to losing a loved one. The problem with this is we live in an age when people put only their most perfect moments on display, it therefore would be easy to feel as if you’re the only one who ever goes through tough times.

Surprise, you are not alone, and the hard parts are just as important for a life full of happiness as positive experiences.It is irrational to think we can rid our lives of all negative experiences. I’ve always said “It’s less about what happens and more about how you deal with it”

Despite what articles, books and social media suggest, human beings are not designed to feel happy every second of everyday. Negative emotions do serve a purpose, both evolutionarily and emotionally. When we think of emotions such as sadness, stress and anxiety as red flags that your mind wants you to pay attention to, sadness and other negative feelings indicate that we nee to make some changes. When we are angry usually it is because we feel we have been wrongly accused of and feel the need to correct. If you feel anxious there may be a threat you need to address. When you are sad it means you care about a situation so deeply that it’s causing you distress. In my life negative situations have always leg me to something better like a job or new relationships. I never beat myself up when I have these feelings because it has been proven repressing negative moods can actually make you feel worse.People who are able to accept their emotions both the light and the dark-without judgement are better able to cope with stress and feel better in the long run. We need to remember Happiness is not static-it’s more about moving towards your goals. I’ve said before, when I am having a difficult day or given a not so positive diagnosis I go into my closet shut the door and either scream, yell, cry or pray. When I’m done throwing my tissy fit I go out the door and it’s over, I’ve trained my brain to deal with disappointments by doing this.

I’ve learned there are a lot of strategies to get past the difficult times. I learned from David Byrd to be present and focus on the good you have in your life right now. If you are able to use your senses to help you snap back into the present it helps. For example if you are sitting you car, feel the back of your leg touching the seat. Feel the air-conditioning blowing on you. This helps remind your brain in sensations that everything is going to be ok- you can find some peace in whatever is going on. Another good old fashion way to remove problems is to have some distractions, my grandchildren are my favorite distractions. Go to a movie, go get a manicure or pedicure maybe even a massage.

Not everything in life is black and white, some people try to sort things that happen into these neat little categories; either good or bad. I am not one of those people I live in the gray area. I think when we focus on either end of the spectrum it ignores the in-between part, the area where I usually live, the gray part. I think the gray area is an exciting are to live in, it shows that you are transitioning, and signals you’re brain that things are finally falling into place. The happiest people I know wouldn’t feel that way if they didn’t experience hard times. We grow and become who we are supposed to be when we experience all of the areas on the spectrum. Most of the people I know who have been through really tough things come out better people because of it–was it fun? Ummmm….No but the strange thing about going through the worst possible scenarios in life is that eventually they become the best things that could have happened to us.

XOXO Monya Bonbon

Cubs Make History

Cubs Make History

On November 2nd 2016 the Chicago Cubs made history.  106 year’s have come and gone since the Cubbie’s won a World Series.

Frenchie and I were on the edge of our seats watching the 7th game of the World Series. I told him I wonder how many people actually had a heart attack tonight–sounds crazy? Not really if you watched this history unfold before your eyes you know exactly what I am talking about.  Sports announcers, and social media made this fact very clear several times proclaiming if you have a heart condition you should use caution watching the game.

Going into overtime we watched as fans from both Chicago Cubs and Cleveland Indians were biting their nails, sitting on the edge of their seats, covering their eyes and some watching with blinders on as they tuned out all worries of the world to see the ending of the great Bambino Curse.  A win for either side was going to make history Cleveland Indians have not had a win for over 60 years. Frenchie and I would have been happy for either team, but watching grown men cry, and embrace each other was touching and gave hope for people to NEVER GIVE UP.

As with all games, there has to be a winner and a loser.  I knew with thousands of people watching half would leave very happy and half would leave very sad-but all would leave completely exhausted as they cheered on their team.  Knowing Dr. Kreymerman is from Cleveland I began texting him-needless to say he went to bed disappointed.  I was very impressed with the classy response from the Cleveland Indians manager Terry Francona-who has never lost a World Series Game — he gave a very compelling speech in congratulating the winning Cubs team.

Days after the game ended Chicago Cubs fans across the nation are celebrating I imagine they will be honoring this win for years to come.  Frenchie and I attend the spring training games every year here in Arizona-with that being said….Arizona for the most part are all Cubbies fans.  They maintained a ‘never give up’ demeanor throughout the entire season and it paid off–Congratulations are an understatement-they deserved to feel proud and grateful for this historical win.

The Winning Game Was Played In Cleveland-
But Wrigley Field In Chicago Was Full of Cubs Fans

 

No matter who you were hoping would win–History was made

 

Congratulations Cubbies you’ve come along way

 

ory

The skinny on skinny

The skinny on skinny

 

Me and Taryn, dinner before the show.

The truth is skinny does not equal happiness or health.  I am the thinest I’ve been since my twenties, I’m also the most unhealthy I have ever been.  I know friends who with age have gained weight–it happens but they are healthy–they run, cycle and eat well balanced meals–they are beautiful.

I was recently asked to be on a Q and A panel immediately following the documentary called Embrace.  Taryn Brumfitt did incredible research on the subject of body image. She interviewed some pretty amazing people.  One common thread that most of them had was they never learned how to love themselves, or their body.  I too struggled with body image as a teenager, I was too skinny and ‘boobless.’ (more about that in my book I CAN-cer vive)  Some people are pre-disposed because of their genes to be thin or heavy.  It’s not the ‘fatty’s’ against the ‘skinny’s’ we are all a part of the human race and deserve love and laughter.

What if I were to say “I wish I wasn’t so thin? or I wish I could gain weight?” If you are honest most people would say or think “I wish I had that problem.” I know this to be true because I have heard people say it to me.  Be careful with your words, what may be an acceptable weight for yourself may not be a healthy weight for another.  When as a youth I heard friends say “You are so skinny!” It hurt, those words were as hard for me to hear as someone saying to another person “You are so fat!” I tried hard to gain weight and never quite accomplished my goal. When I graduated from high school I was 5′ 9″ and weighed only 96 pounds–that my friends is not healthy!!

When I speak to youth about body image it’s interesting to open up for Q and A–most hesitate to ask questions knowing their peers are surrounding them and what they have to contribute may not be acceptable.  The few moments of silence tells me they all are squirming in their seats because the thought of talking about their body is embarrassing–

I usually break the ice by asking this question, “If you could change anything about your physical body what would it be?” I laugh and say “I’d change my smile I loved my smile before my paralysis” When the dialogue begins it is magical to hear–most of our youth are not happy with something, usually I hear them talk about their weight, or things they were born with–like a not so perfect nose or believe it or not their feet or toes.  I love that one.  I remember a very handsome kid in high school who determined the girls he would date by looking at their toes–he needed the perfect shape- no toes were allowed to be taller than another–Say whaaaat? Seriously, toes? You may be wondering why I find this conversation magical–let me explain.  When our youth collectively come together and are able to say out loud “I don’t like___about myself”  It gives everyone in the room a safe environment to talk about these issues, the youth usually walk away realizing they are not alone, but more importantly they are not perfect, imperfections are what make them unique. For some of them it is the beginning of embracing who they are and the endless possibilities they have to make a difference in our world.

When I was diagnosed with permanent facial paralysis, it was devastating.  I went into a deep depression wondering how I would fit in, I still have moments of doubt but now I’ve learned how to harness that silly thinking by allowing myself a few minutes to mourn then looking myself in the mirror and telling myself I am uniquely beautiful from the inside out.  Another healing thing I did was write a letter to myself, I scribbled down a few things I needed to let go of and let be. Those unimportant things that were serving no good purpose to my life are now a part of my past not my future, then I burned the paper.

 

 

 

This sweet lady is featured in the documentary Embrace. I was privileged to meet and talk to her. She has facial paralysis, obviously not as pronounced as mine but just as real.  This was a moment I never thought I would have.  Permanent paralysis from a nerve dying only effects 2% of people. Jade had a benign brain tumor that caused hers. I have to admit I teared up talking to someone who knows exactly what I am feeling–the messy eating–and the frozen eyebrow were just a few things we talked about coming to the conclusion we are imperfectly perfect

So, I’ve asked myself plenty of times over the past couple of years “How can I make this a positive experience? How can I endure and be blissfully happy with a disfigured face? Who will I allow in MY circle of trust and friendship?”  I cannot change the world, but I can create a ripple effect by speaking out, embracing other’s and being inclusive.

**Just a side note and after thought, our youth need to understand they are beautiful they way they are, but they also need to know this is not an excuse to feed their insecurities with food, we are a nation of obese people–this too needs to stop and is not healthy. Childhood obesity is on the rise, as parents we need to teach them a healthy balance of all natural foods–and guess what? It’s ok to eat dessert first, once in awhile.

Surgery #35

Surgery #35

On June 30th I entered Maricopa County Hospital with Dr. Lettieri (my smile doctor)

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Myself and Dr. Lettieri-just before surgery

I wasn’t nervous or afraid, after all he was just repairing some of the skin that was ripped off after my skin graft.  This should be an easy surgery….right?

After surgery they doctor usually takes Eric in a private room and discusses the finding of the surgery.  Not expecting much change imagine Eric’s surprise when Dr. Lettieri told him he found a lump with the consistency of cancer he needed to extract and take to the lab.  During that extraction he had to cut through muscle and down to the bone. This has been very difficult to recover from; he also left me with no appetite and a drain hanging from my head.
I was texting Dr. Kreymerman the other night, he was asking how I was doing….I sent him a picture of my drain and told him these always remind me of him.
PK’s answer back “Gee Thanks”
My reply “It’s not a bad thing, It just brought back memories of me wanting to kick you when you asked me to wear it for another week.  Now I realize the reasons why.?”
Dr. Lettieri has been so kind and compassionate with me on Tuesday I was back in his office. Hoping for the drain to come out but realistically knowing that was not going to happen and it didn’t.
On Wednesday I was in so much pain I could not turn my head, lying my head on my pillow was excruciating  pain also exploding me into tears.  I called Dr. Lettieri and asked if he could meet me take out the staples, which I thought was help relieve.  He took out all of the staples, the relief from that pain did not improve for a few days.  With lots of ice packs and patience the pain finally subsided well at least a lot less than what it was.  I do not like pain medicine, so I resorted to ibuprofen on the proper requested amount from the Dr. Lettieri.
The best news of all was Dr. Lettieri telling us the lump was ‘CANCER FREE’ this was encouraging.
The lump was full of scar tissue and muscle from previous surgeries.
My family seemed very pleased.  I had many people praying for me from every religious beliefs. Thank you to everyone person who helped the those prayers meet the Heavens because it worked.
I thought I had been so spoiled going to Mayo Clinic, I still love and adore all my doctors who I still see. However, Dr. Lettieri who is hired by Mayo Clinic also works through Maricopa County Hospital is brilliant in all he does.  Meeting him at MCIH is so much easier for me and for him.
The staff at MHIS is by far the nicest people I have ever met.  They remember me when I return and call me by my name with a huge hug and smile.  I am never left alone, one of them is always with me and I appreciate their attention and kindness.
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Just to give you an idea of the seriousness of this
infection.  It is getting so much better.
Thank You Dr. Lettieri

This last procedure will hopefully do the trick and clear this up so Dr. Lettieri can move on to the nerve problem.  I know many people have asked me if this was a Doctor error…..I want to say with and inequitable answer ABSOLUTELY NOT.  My mother and brother both died of infections, it’s a part of the make up of my DNA.  I cannot take them lightly when they occur.
Today I still have the drain, that will hopefully change tomorrow.  Eric and I have not gotten away for quite some time and we have a trip planned.  I’m leaving on July17th for a Happiness convention in Dallas.  I will also be filming a video for them. Then meeting Eric in Cancun after ward  I have to get Dr. Lettieri’s approval, but I know as well as he does I need a break.
Surgery March 28th Dr. Lettieri

Surgery March 28th Dr. Lettieri

I had a hard time sleeping last nigh with only 3 hours before surgery I at least tried.  I’m not anxious about the surgery or Dr. Lettieri. Again this morning  doctors and nurses all had positive things to say about him. One nurse said  “Oh My Gosh, I would not have any other trauma surgeon work on me. The anesthesiologist  and his assistant mentioned him as colorful.  I know he tries to come off as a hard butt, I’ve seen it with the residents when they make a mistake.  However, I know Dr.Lettieri and know he wants to teach these young up coming Doctors how to do procedures the right way, the first time.  He explained to a resident at Mayo if he had not known what I was going under sedation for or understand where I’ve been, my history, fears and anxiety this cute little resident could have cut off the wrong ear, or with other patients the wrong arm or leg.  Yes, he was a little rough with him but respectful in showing him the correct way.  At that very moment I knew he was the surgeon for me.

So he gifted Frenchie  and I with his presence explained exactly what he was gong to do, then they talked real estate—blah blah blah. When he left for the surgery room Frenchie sat next me to and held my hand telling me how beautiful I was.  Seriously, my skin has never looked or felt better.  Several nurses hearing him talk about my beauty were so interested and rushed over to our little pod.  He then told them how beautiful they were and how refreshing it was to work with such happy women and men today.  All three of them were shocked, it was as if no man had ever told them. Frenchie snapped a picture with me and them for my blog.

One nurse said when I walked in, there was aura around me, she could feel my energy was one of happiness.  This made me smile without hesitation, she was seeing past my own insecurities. She then asked me to go remove my make-up…very proudly I announced “I don’t have any on” she quickly grabbed by chart and sighed…”you are 53-year-old?” me “yep and proud of it” her ” I want to try it, and even sell it if I can.” me “Of course you can, I will get you a sample just as soon as I can get your phone # and email address. (email sent before I entered surgery).

She then asked me about my journey with my home based business, I told her the truth, my life, just like everyone else is full of trials, most we cannot see.  I started in Network Marketing 2 months before the facial paralysis.  I told her it was an inspired intervention, I’ve now had 10 surgeries with Dr. Lettieri and 31 total in the past 6 year at Mayo Clinic with some pretty special surgeons.  I have never slowed down sharing everyday, magazine, bottles, videos, 3 way calls, etc.. The most important things she loved about me was the Happiness Movement and the Night Cream.  I wish the person who told me “If I spent more time on my home based business than I did on #happyacts for the #marchtohappiness I would be making a lot more money, would have heard this conversation. Home based businesses graciously allows me to do all of them at once. I do, I am always prepared with samples.

I always do at least one #happact a day and feel uncomfortable sharing those on social media, I’ve always been taught acts of kindness should be done in quiet with a reverent heart.  But since it was the challenge  for March 20 being the international Day of Happiness–they asked us all to do an act a day and post it until March 31st.  Surround yourself with like-minded people, I happen to enjoy sharing my business and sharing a cookie or two.

This reminded me of a story told in Church yesterday by a bishop who visits the men in Prison. This young man we will call him John made some mistakes as teenager, drinking, drugs etc, but was finally able to reconcile with God and be forgiven. He moved from where he lived to get a fresh start his brother and wife invited him to live with them in their barn until he could get a job. He did and was grateful to them. His brother’s oldest daughter told them that John had sexually abused her. This went to trial, but during the trial the little girl told her mother she lied, that it never happened. Johns brother and wife never told anyone, and John was sentenced to 65 years in Prison at age 22. He begged and pleaded with family to help, all of them including mom and dad, brothers and sisters wrote to him and encouraged him to forgive. He’s never heard back from his brother or sister-in-law. It took John 10 years in Prison to finally come to a place of forgiveness and allow the spirit to help him survive. Last month when the Bishop visited him, he asked the Bishop to lay his hands on his head and give him a blessing, but in this blessing he wanted the Bishop to ask the Lord to forgive his niece, brother and sister so that they could get on with their lives. I entered the Maricopa County Hospital this morning for my #31 surgery, as my husband and I walked, in front of us was a young boy probably in his 20’s coming from the prison. with guards and shackles on his arms, hand and feet. Tears rolled down my face, looking at Eric (my husband) he immediately thought I was anxious or scared about my surgery, I then smiled at the young boy, said “hello, have a good day” and my husband said “don’t talk to them” My tears were both for all of us who immediately judge, it’s a natural reaction, and for this young boy whether guilty or not, we are not his judge our mission it always to cheer up the weak and show compassion for the wounded. What if that were your child?